Dating as a guy in today’s social climate is tough.
This past week, I got to chat with Denver-based Dating Coach Mark Sing, who specializes in NLP – neuro linguistic programming. He helps men gain confidence and teaches them how to effectively create romantic connections. Below is a sample of what we covered during his guest appearance on the Dating and Relationship Show.
Release your attachment to “outcome”
Approaching women can be tough for a lot of men, and often it’s because it’s easy to fall into the trap of being outcome dependent. Men typically approach a girl with a goal, i.e. getting her number. Try reframing your mindset – instead of approaching a woman with the intent to take something from her, lead with the desire to give. Bring value when you approach a woman. This is great for a variety of reasons – it will take a lot of the pressure off of you, and allow you to be in the moment with her. Mindset can truly change the game.
Control the Frame
Ok, here’s how this concept works, as explained by Mark Sing. It’s no secret that women dig alpha men. One of the biggest principles of attraction boils down to your ability to control the frame – aka the way in which you converse with women. When two people interact, there is always one person who is leading the conversation, and another who’s reacting. Controlling the frame is exactly as it implies – you need to take the lead. A lot of men come from a place where they’re supplicating the woman. This results in you essentially giving her all the power, and honestly, making her uncomfortable. Instead, establish your presence and tap into those alpha qualities. Become a man who is unafraid to lead the conversation.
Master the Push and Pull
The push and pull is a technique that I strongly believe in – it’s an essential part of flirting, and is something I talk about a lot in my new program, Get the Total approach.
Flirting is a game, point blank. It’s about being playful. Conveying your attraction super strong isn’t the most effective way to flirt because you’re instantly giving away your power. It’s no secret that mixed signals drive us all insane, but here’s the thing; It’s a great tool for building attraction. When we’re off balance, and not entirely sure what’s going on, or how someone feels about us, we become massively interested. So the push and pull is that dance between showing interest, yet being aloof. Pulling someone closer before drawing back, just a little. To learn more about this technique, be sure to check out my new program.
It all begins with You
This is huge. The key to attracting someone great in your life? Be the person you wish to attract. Work towards becoming the best version of yourself, and everything will fall into place. Know who you are, know what you’re worth and develop a strong sense of self. This will help you immensely when it comes to attracting women – nothing is sexier than confidence. But most importantly, it will enrich your life as a whole.
Know the Importance of Hygiene
Women like guys who take care of themselves. It’s as simple as that. So clean your nails. Get regular haircuts. Trim your beard. Work out. Dress well. Proper grooming and dressing well communicates social intelligence. Plus you’ll feel good. When you feel good, people notice.
For more dating tips, be sure to check out Mark’s episode on the The Dating and Relationship Show.
