It’s great because it exposes you to hundreds of potential partners you’d otherwise have no chance to ever encounter. But it can be disappointing sometimes, though, because some users are deceiving about who they really are.
I’ve coached dozens of hopeful singles who have been fooled by fake pictures and profiles, or fed the lengthy run-around by one of those all too familiar online dating time-wasters with bad intentions. Here are some of my Online Dating Experiences:
People who lie about their height, body-type, and use fake pictures to represent themselves untruly. Fake, as in: that’s what they looked like ten years ago. And fake, as in: it’s a picture of somebody else. Then you have fake profile perpetrators who pose as potential suiters and try to scam money out of you. It happens; be careful. If your instincts tell you something is fishy, trust your instincts.
Not to mention, you can never truly understand a person’s persona based on pictures and emails, even if the pictures are real.
But online dating isn’t all bad. In fact, many people who meet online find love and get married.
Dating in general is such a numbers game that it only makes sense to give online dating a whirl – you will meet people online and as you sift through the legitimate suiters and the time-wasters, there is an opportunity for you to find your true love on an online dating website.
But watch out for the time-wasters! If you’re currently chatting with someone online and they more than once cancel, postpone or give an excuse as to why they can’t meet up with you – move on. That person isn’t serious about finding someone, and you are. Don’t waste your time playing their game.
I’ve been on dates with men I met online. Some have been pleasant and others have been awful. I’ve had first dates with men who looked nothing like they did in their profile pictures, and it’s awkward.
One guy once told me he was 5-foot-9 but he was actually 5-foot-6. I have nothing against a man who is 5-foot-6, but I’m not interested in a guy who lies about who he is – it’s a turn-off. Did he think I wouldn’t notice how tall he was? And then I’m thinking, well if he lied about his height, what else is this guy lying about? Don’t create that doubt, fellas.
People have a tendency to feel empowered behind the comforts of a computer screen and that’s a shame because online dating can be so great when the mischievous types aren’t exploiting it. They’ll say this and that and sometimes it’s exactly what you want to hear but none of it is based in truth. When the first meet up occurs, they are exposed, and at that point you’ve wasted some pretty good time chatting and meeting up with them. But I guess it’s not all a waste – it’s a lesson learned.
Not all online daters are liars with bad intentions – there are several (the vast majority, I like to think) who simply want to find someone they can develop a relationship with, and it takes a bit of back-and-forth chatting to determine who is what.
You should absolutely try online dating – it does work for many people – but know that it takes a bit of patience to find your match. Don’t be discouraged by a bad experience.
Online dating provides an opportunity to find a partner, however, it is not the only worthwhile love seeking option that exists.
Obviously, I run a company – Single In The City – that has been hosting speed dating events for more than a decade. Naturally, I will promote my business by telling you that speed dating is a terrific way to meet people. But, I’d like to also be clear that I’ve had success in the dating industry because speed dating works. Many professionals have met their match and experienced love with someone they met at a Single In The City event over the last fourteen years.
When you speed date, you sit face-to-face with several prospective boyfriends or girlfriends in five minute intervals. You get to speak with them, see what they look like in person, observe how they carry themselves, and witness their ora. While speed dating you can establish chemistry quickly, or endure five forgettable minutes and never speak to that person again – it’s entirely up to you, and him or her.
At speed dating events, the participants care enough about finding someone that they take the time to dress up in nice clothing, travel to the event location, and spend a few bucks for a night out with promise in the air. We also do mixers if you’d rather mingle within a group setting. Either way, it’s face-to-face and it’s real.
If your recent online dating experiences have not met your expectations, don’t quit on online, but consider speed dating as a terrific alternative – another road that may lead you to the one.
There is very little required of you – simply sign up for an event or call Single In The City and I’ll tell you what to expect from our speed dating and mixer events. You never know, your perfect match may be signing up right now.
And keep in mind that if the first event isn’t perfect keep trying because it’s a numbers game – like anything else – and you never know when you’re special someone will be there, sitting across the table from you; the perfect smile – the one you’ve been waiting for, and they’ve been waiting for you, too.