Recognizing the signs: She loves you, she loves you not

Are you one of those guys who thinks that if a woman so much as talks to you for a minute she loves you?

If you are, you’re not the only one, and it’s not necessarily a bad thing. It means you’re confident (or delusional). However, it could also mean that you’re setting yourself up for plenty of heartbreaking surprises.

I know a guy who believes every nice gesture or smile from a woman is a clear indicator that she’s in loooove. She probably is, but not with him. My point is, some guys have trouble distinguishing between innocent friendliness and actual interest. That sort of misinterpretation can lead to constant disappointment. 

Guys, sometimes a woman is interested if she’s willing to converse with you, but that’s not enough evidence to be absolutely sure she’s feeling a love connection. There are other, more obvious signs, that I will tell you about right now. 

Let me set the scene: You’re at a pub or lounge and there’s a gorgeous looking gal at the other end of the bar. 

She just looked in your general direction… maybe even at you, but you’re not yet sure. You don’t want to stare but something inside compels you to glance regularly in her direction. Gotcha. She did it again! And this time you’re sure it is you she yearns for. Yes! 

If the looks become frequent and a slight smile graces her face, followed by a couple rounds of mutually enjoyable shared eye-contact between the two of you – that’s her way of inviting you over to her side of the bar. Go say, “hello.” There is a decent chance she might be interested. 

Here’s the thing: When a woman is caught in an awkward eye-contact accidental stare-down with a crazy-eyed bugger, she will cease all looks for fear of inviting unwanted attention from that guy she’s not interested in, but was caught looking at. Listen guys, people look around when they’re in public; it doesn’t necessarily mean they want to take you home and hug you all night.

However, when a woman is interested she will welcome the eye-contact… she will even provoke it, accompanied by smiling and hair teasing, giving you that signal: Hey handsome, why don’t you get over here and introduce yourself.

Lesson: Don’t assume she loves you after one, or even two looks in your direction. Flirt with the situation for a bit. If the looks continue and become increasingly obvious, as in, smiling and staring starts to last longer, and hair play begins, then she’s probably receptive about you approaching her. Work up the courage and make the first move. 

Playing with her hair could be a sign that she loves you. 

I’ll bet you’ve heard this one before: When a woman plays with her hair she is interested in you. It is true. According to, “in most instances, a girl playing with her hair while she is talking to a guy means that she is interested in him. In rare cases, she might actually be bored, but it’s usually a sign of interest and flirting.” 

Wow, did you hear that guys? So you’re saying there’s a chance?!?!

Lesson: If a woman is deeply engaged in conversation with you and she just so happens to be teasing her hair, you are either extremely boring or she wants to get to know you better! Assume she’s interested and act accordingly. Give her a light compliment. Tell her you like her earrings, shoes or some accessory that accentuates her outfit or personal style. Gauge her reaction and go with the flow. If the flirting picks up and she gets closer, leans on you, or touches your arm and giggles, that’s your cue. Ask her out already! 

She loves you: smiles and teasing looks. 

Fellas, remember when you were a kid one of the girls in your class used to tease you a lot? All the older people told you “she’s teasing you because she likes you.” 

And you said, “she likes me? She better not! She’s a girl and I hate girls! I’ve had enough of this conversation. I’ll be in my room playing Sega Genesis.” Remember that? 

That young lady classmate of yours did in fact have a childhood crush on you, but you were just a baby boy – you didn’t know any better. That’s totally fine. But it’s NOT fine if you are an adult and you’re still ignoring such obvious teasing signs. But keep in mind, the way adult women tease a guy they’re crushing on is different than the way children flirt and tease with one another on the playground. 

If a grown woman calls you “stupid head” then whips a tennis ball at your face and runs away skipping and laughing, you should probably move on… she probably isn’t the one for you. However, if an attractive woman in your life makes a habit of poking fun at you, playfully touching you, and leaning on you; it’s her way of subtly letting you know she’s interested. You are in! 

Lesson: If a woman smiles, teases and flirts, and she generally appears interested in what you have to say when you’re together, then she probably has some degree of interest in you. Embrace it. Be confident. Ask her out and find out if she loves you or she loves you not. 

By sitcadmin | February 16, 2014
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