You may not realize it but you could be over sharing about your relationship to your friends. Being able to confide in your friends is important, especially when it comes to relationship troubles, but there are a lot of things to consider before talking to them about your relationship drama. In this blog I’m going to lay the 3 things you should consider before you dish to your friends about your relationship woes.
1) Are you going to forgive your partner?
We have a tendency to only talk about our partners to our friends when they’re doing something wrong, so your friends may have a warped perception of them. Even if you forgive your partner for whatever it is that they did, you’re friends will likely be mad about it forever, so if what they did it isn’t really a big deal to you than it’s best to keep it to yourself. Nothing is worse than your friends hating your partner. If you are complaining about your partner make sure to even it out with the things that are good in your relationship. There are of course exceptions to this rule; if your partner is physically or emotionally abusing you you should disclose this to someone you trust or better yet a healthcare professional or law enforcement.
2) Is the drama really personal to your partner?
Did your partner just find out their dad has another family? Their parents are getting divorced? Turns out they’re adopted? These things may be dominating your relationship right now and causing a lot of tension but it isn’t your drama to tell. You have to think about your partner’s feelings, would they really want all your friends knowing about these sensitive things in their life? Probably not. By telling your friends your partner’s problems you’re breaching their trust, which can cause relationship trouble for you down the line.
3) Is your friend having a hard time?
If you’re friend is having a hard time or is complaining about their relationship then they don’t need you to be one-upping them with your problems. Being a good friend means listening without interrupting. If you’re having major problems wait to make sure they’re done venting before you chime in.
So there you have it; 3 things you need to consider before you start talking to your friends about your relationship trouble. Don’t have anyone to talk about your relationship troubles with? Book a date coaching session with me today!