Not hearing from someone you’re genuinely interested is extremely hard. It can be easy to tailspin, opening a windfall of emotions.

At some point or another most people experience their date not calling or texting them back. It’s a brutal reality of dating. When this happens I want you to first stop and take a deep breath.

What to do when he doesn’t call:

  1. Don’t panic: You don’t have enough information yet to determine what is going on. However, if it’s been a few days then all signs point to this guy is flaking out on you.
  2. It’s OK to follow-up, but only once.  When he doesn’t call, if you feel unsure and want clarity, it’s best to just call him and feel out the situation.  Do not come at him in an accusatory manner but from a place of wanting to understand where he is at and where you stand in the situation.  Does he seem surprised to hear from you? Does he sound genuinely happy to hear from you?  Sometimes life takes over, but a guy that is really into you, will make the effort.  If you have followed up once and he’s still going MIA, leave it. DO NOT keep texting or calling him. You have his answer just from his silence. It’s very true that actions speak louder than words and if this guy is not taking the time to call or text you back, you don’t want him.
  3. Get busy. Get back to you and get busy. What can you do in this moment to get your mind off this guy? Enlist your friends to go on a fun outing, go for a run, get out of your house. Anything you need to do to keep busy and get back to you.
  4. Try not to overthink it. Sometimes people are not meant to be, it’s as simple as that. Just because you’re not meant to be, doesn’t mean you’re not good enough, pretty enough or smart enough. He’s just not the right guy for you. Dating people and our ability to move forward when things don’t work out, is part of the dating journey.
  5. Trust what is happening.  As hard as it may be to understand, if this person is stepping out of your life now, it’s for a reason. Trust what is happening to you. You won’t have to chase people that are meant to be in your life. Trust that if this person is not taking the time to call or message you back, he’s likely not interested and not the one.

When struggling with what to do when he doesn’t call, always remember, you want someone in your life that wants to be there. Don’t settle for anything less. There IS someone out there who you won’t have to question their intentions. He will be calling and messaging you and making an effort to see you, no question.